Fr. Donald Calloway-"Medjugorje: A Call to Priesthood" 2004

Jesus Christ - True Leader and Perfect Gentleman

140) It is time to bid you farewell.

"Most of us go to our graves with our music still inside us, unplayed."  Oliver Wendall Holmes

Hello!

The music in me has not been muted - unplayed. Only time will tell if I succeeded in playing it well. For now, I am content that I played it.

That music took the form of writing on virtue and value-based parenting - the most important vocation in life. To bring up children - future citizens - is no easy task. It is demanding. It is 24/365. Yet it is rewarding - to watch children grow into responsible adults. It is a pleasure that is unmatched;  a joy without measure.

I have had the good fortune, with my beloved wife Mabel, to raise four sons - the pride of our home. That they lived by the standards we cherish, compensates us far more than we deserve. We thank God that they turned out right, because there are some good parents who shed hot tears for children who drift. They tried but failed. God was missing in their plans.

As parents, we can watch over children in some ways, not always and in all ways. We cannot put a lid on their thoughts or govern all their actions. Knowing our inadequacy we relied heavily on God and His all-embracing protection. We believed that He would work His wonders, if we let Him! And He did!

In my recently published book, THE CHILD IS FATHER OF THE MAN - TIPS AND TECHNIQUES FOR WISE PARENTING, I have tried to share lessons my wife and I learned in our parenting, over 44 years. With God on our side, it turned out right.

The book was the last stage in a process: 1) I started with a series of 12 articles on parenting, encouraged by Joe Antony SJ - the former Editor of The New Leader. The articles were published in some magazines and on some American Sites. 2) The favorable response I received prompted me to host a blog, which you have been visiting. 3) With the push I got from the articles and the blog I advanced to the next stage - the book. It is available in print and ebook formats - Amazon and Kindle. It is published by Wolf Creek Press, Oregon, USA. My website - www.ignatiusfernandez.com - has details and links.

Now that the book is available, I think the purpose of the blog is accomplished - to serve as a preamble. Therefore it is time to sign out. With this post I shall halt my contributions to the blog - which is 140 posts old. I thank each of you for visiting my blog. I hope it gave some of you impetus in your parenting mission.

Before I close, I would like to share a thought with you: Is there music in you that is unplayed? Look for it; find it. And play it. Perhaps you like to write, paint, compose/play music, dance, photograph, or excel in some area of your choice. Start now. Tomorrow may be late - because we do not know what is in store for us. Trust in yourself and God and take the first step. You will not regret it.

In the same way, let your children find the voice that is silent. Let them give expression to it. Nurture that. In time they will change halting steps into firm, measured paces. Who knows there could be a Mozart, Monet, Charles Dickens, Milton or Albert Einstein within the confines of your home! Unchain the child. Give it space. Give it wings. You owe it to the child.

I wish you and your children happy journeys in life!

God bless.
Ignatius Fernandez
www.ignatiusfernandez.

Guest Article by Maria Gavriel

Clearing Space

Before a Renewal

by Maria Gavriel

I am slowly encroaching into the middle of my life’s

journey and find more and more that life is throwing

larger and harder curve balls in my direction. In the last

year I have been challenged with a fair amount of

experiences that have stretched me farther than I ever

thought possible. From all that was pouring onto me, I

began to believe that I could never come out whole, once

the storm was finally over. I can now say that it was the

biggest gift I offered myself and my family. My experi

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ences allowed the opportunity for personal work in areas I

never dared to travel to. And because I ventured into the

darkness, I am now able to offer light not only to myself,

but to my husband and children.

How did all this come to fruition? We first had to clear

the way. During the spring, my husband and I always

enjoy the benefits of a long, clean detox. This was always

on a physical level. We didn’t know that we were in need

of a deeper detox, until we were immersed in it. This

inner cleanse began at a ripe time in our lives, where

it was either “do or die”. What does that mean? Well, the

way our lives functioned at the time, was not authentic

enough to be sustainable. Often, we don’t realize how

important it is for us to clean our space. Sometimes we

are not even aware that there is any clearing necessary

and we walk through life with a bundle of garbage that

simply inhibits us from achieving greatness. And this

affects everyone around us – especially the ones we love

the most. The ones who get the brunt of it, are our children

– the next generation.

Personally, I thought I was perfect. And anyone that met

me called me Super Mom, Career Woman, Super Woman,

and all these awesome names that were a compliment

for an over achiever like me. The truth is that on the

outside, it did seem like I had it all, and it was all well put

together. I created the perfect life. Once I was officially

welcomed into motherhood, I began to feel the discomfort

of a mirror being held up at me all day long. My children

grew into toddlers and they began acting out in ways that

were somehow familiar to me. Children and the reflection

they offer you are a gift. You can’t escape the truth once

they are part of your life, because they innocently show

you all that you may not want to see.

The way it all went downwards (before it skyrocketed

upwards) was when my son and daughter began having

social challenges at school. My daughter went from a

sweet little sugarplum to an angry hitter and biter, and

my son went from social butterfly and a leader to being

impeached by his 5 yr. old friends – he was left to play

alone. I got into fights with friends and other parents

about my children and it grew into a horrible, painful,

dramatic year. I kept asking in my prayers for guidance to

help my children through this time. During that year, my

marriage was also being strained but I figured it was just

a side effect of all that was happening. Several months

later I began feeling surges of anger fester in me that were

really worrying me. Shortly after that, I realized I was a

secretly unhappy, angry person, but kept wondering what

about my life is making me feel this way? I must be so

ungrateful and blind to all that I have in my life. Suddenly,

spiritual books began flooding onto my nightstand from

recommendations, gifts, and all sorts of ways. At one point

I was reading 3 at the same time. I began practicing

affirmations, meditations, visualizations, prayer, and essential

oil therapy and the more I invited healing modalities into

my life, the worse my life got. That was confusing....

For the sake of keeping this brief, let’s just say that I was

faced with unpleasant possibilities - with an uncertain

future in my marriage; losing the perfect life that I created

and knew so well; and the fate of my life, my husband’s

and my children’s was to take a very different and unknown

turn. This heart wrenching and confusing time, forced

me to immerse myself into an abyss within me. I took the

plunge into a rotten, ugly area that I thought had surely

disappeared. This reflection led me to the most painful

moments of betrayal caused by all the people that I loved

intensely. I had to face feelings of distrust, judgment,

and pain. Being in a place of “all in”, I confronted all that

created a road block in my life. All the ugly moments that

created a chain hold on me. All that held me back was

due to my unresolved human experience. Confrontation

meant that I also confronted the people that played a role

during the painful moments throughout my journey. I

then came to the most honest moment so far – that I was

not perfect, and I had lots of work to do. At the time of

this cleanse, my experience was unbearable and beyond

horrible. I thought I would never see the light and climb

out. I reached and I pulled out all the healing modalities

from my tool box that I was gifted by the universe. I need

-

ed everything I had in order to find my way out of this

spinning, uncontrollable ride. And when I finally made it

out and saw the light, I was grateful to all the

beloved people that had “hurt” me. I realized that they

were my biggest teachers. I am grateful for their committed

love and for offering me the largest lessons in my life.

They challenged me in ways that allowed me to expand

and transform into the person I always dreamed to be.

It is important to mention that, by beautiful and intended

coincidence, my husband was also stretched and healed

during the same year and he has expanded in ways he

only dreamed of. He is the husband and partner I always

dreamed of. Because we dared to face our personal hold

ups and how they created our marital issues, our relationship

has transformed and grown deeper roots than ever. Both

his work and mine still continues, and is now merging.

Thanks to our challenges, we have taken our first steps

towards our life’s purpose and we are beginning to un

-

derstand what it is that we came here to do. We detoxed,

cleaned out our past, cleared our path, our prohibitions

and now feel liberated and full of endless possibility.

The most beautiful part is witnessing how this all affected

our children and even our extended family

relationships. Healing our wounds has freed our children

and has brought us closer to our loved ones. Both of

our children are now grounded, loving, caring, playful,

affectionate and truly amazing little souls. Our

transformation trickled down to them. This awesome

change in them did not take place as a result of their own

personal work, but ours. They just enjoy the benefits

of mommy’s and daddy’s success. There hasn’t been any

arguing in our home for over year. There’s always

maintenance, and a clearing of space however. We have

now acquired the tools of clean communication so that

there is never any build up or any toxicity festering. Our

children have wonderful, healthy friendships and are

thriving in all areas of life; physically, emotionally, socially

and spiritually. I am grateful for the work that we have

put in, because now our children have the opportunity

to experience their own life’s ups and downs without our

baggage weighing them down unnecessarily.

I believe it is important for parents to continuously reflect

and heal whatever is tugging within them, for the sake of

their children. If we all practice this as parents, we offer

great opportunities for our children to be able to give to

the world in tremendous ways. Through powerful, healthy

families and children, we ultimately, allow for greater

possibilities for our world and for our future. My family

has experienced a rebirth and a renewal into a new way

of being; a way we never imagined but only dreamed and

hoped for.

So, if experiencing a downfall in your family unit, instead

of looking elsewhere for something new, try to water your

own garden and plant new seeds. The grass can be greener

and more beautiful than you expected on your side – it

may even transform into a spectacular flower garden!

Maria Gavriel enjoys a wholistic lifestyle with her

husband and two children. She loves family time

in nature, sharing about her parenting downfalls

and triumphs, raising awareness and her own

downtime when she is meditating or working on

her new book Wholistic Parenting: Following Your

Inner Wisdom and Nature’s Plan. She is an HMN

member and the voice behind lovecenteredparenting.com. She leads educational

community workshops on natural remedies, GMO events, and other topics.

139) Learn Lessons - on doing our something to give to the world

"Everyone on earth should believe that he has something to give to the world, which cannot otherwise be given." G K Chesterton

During World War II, when food was scarce, a kind baker distributed some loaves for poor children. As soon as the bread was ready the children would rush and grab the big loaves. But one little girl always patiently waited for the rush to be over and happily picked up the last small loaf. She did this everyday. One day, when she got home and broke her loaf, some silver coins fell out. The kind baker had stuffed the smallest loaf with a few coins, to reward the gentle and generous child who willingly stood aside when others fought for their share.

The baker gave something to the world when he rewarded that unselfish child. The child did something which the others did not - she showed how good breeding makes a difference. Her good behavior stood out.

What is that something special that we do? What do we teach our children to do? How do they stand out? It is time we found some answers.

138) Osteoporosis

Hip Replacement - American Recall Center