99) Teach children lessons - setting norms

"We don't see things as they are; we see them as we are." Anais Nin.

A man passes a watch maker's shop everyday and stops to correct his watch. The watch maker sees this and inquires why the man had to correct his watch daily. He replies that he works in the adjoining factory and has to make sure that he rings the factory bell exactly at 4PM at closing time. Concealing a blush, the watch maker confides that his clock does not work well and that he corrects his clock everyday when the factory bell rings.

The story may amuse us, but strangely that is what happens to many of us. We keep adjusting our value system to the norms others have only to discover that their norms are suspect. We try to ape others to be befuddled when we find that we are following the wrong standards. Sometimes we have the courage to change and reset our value system. At other times we just carry on. The problem strikes us when our children act likewise. They switch from time to time to adopt priorities of those they fancy. They do not stop to search their minds. They do not see things as they are but as they are - blind followers of others. We owe it to them, not only to have the right standards for our lives, but also help set their own clocks.

98) Teach children lessons - value relationships

"In spite of everything I still believe that people are really good at heart."
Anne Frank (Nazi victim)

Leo Tolstoy in his book My Confessions admits to the blunder of chasing fame through his writings, which robbed him of the treasure of relationships.

Very often we commit the same mistake. We chase our money goals. We fall in love with a position and will do anything to retain it. We hanger after things and possessions, ignoring people who are important in our lives. We choose things over people. Our relationships suffer. Instead of recognizing goodness in people, we find goodness in things. Our children watch what we do and imitate what we do. For them also friends are less important to the things they value. Even people at home become second best. God loses His place in their lives. They chase dreams that are insubstantial. It is time our thinking changed and our example became edifying. Otherwise like Leo Tolstoy, we will have regrets and in our footsteps our children will lament the missed opportunities.