Monday, March 9, 2009

4) Holding up Parenting, the multi-faced Diamond

What is a Diamond? The Oxford Dictionary gives it the following meaning: it is 'a precious stone consisting of clear, colorless form of pure carbon, the hardest naturally occurring substance'.

Why is Parenting like a Diamond? BECAUSE A PARENT IS:

PRECIOUS: Who can deny that? A child who has lost his parents will vouch for that. Besides the child knowing that, it is important that Parents realize how vital their role is; and feel proud of being entrusted with the child, by a Trusting God.

COLORLESS: A parent should not suffer from any bias for or against a child. Any thinking which is colored leads to discoloration. Therefore, a parent will have no pets, no favorites, no preference for boy over girl or girl over boy. A mother of six was asked who of her children she loved most. She said that she loved that child most who was in trouble. When he got out of trouble, she loved most the next who was in trouble. Her focus was on the need of the child.

PURE: Parenting is flawed when the child is exploited and not served. Then the Diamond loses luster and value. My Father often said: 'Expectation is a sure recipe for disappointment'. Expect nothing; have no agenda, he explained. In the purity of his/her heart, let no parent expect payback. If it comes, by way of caring and serving acts of the child, treat such behavior as a bonus and be thankful to God and the child.

HARD: A parent is hard(tough) in making sacrifices for the child; without complaining; not expecting appreciation. And he/she is hard(strong) in resisting decadent and corrosive ideas and practices that try to eat into the family-fabric; and is hard(firm) in disciplining.

NATURAL: Loving and caring come naturally to parents. For them, it is not a show of affection, but the very beat of their large hearts. To them, it is as easy as breathing. In the shade of God's outstretched Hand,they mold the child for posterity.

MULTI-FACED: The many faces of a Diamond glow. So does a Parent, through diverse skills. Teaching and training; counseling and disciplining; providing emotional and physical support and healing. There is nothing that a parent will not do for the child.

SHINING: A Diamond dazzles and is brilliant. So is a parent whose goodness shines. Through some unchecked weakness, if a parent loses sparkle, the child is impacted;
sometimes irreversibly. So,a parent has no choice but to shine brightly.

How do we measure up? How many carats?
(More on these points will appear in subsequent posts.)

1 comment:

  1. The fact is many of us fall short. We ought to be diamonds, but most of the time aren't. That's just my view. We try but fail. We succeed, but are not consistent. There is often a deep seated selfishness hidden under layers of possessiveness, the tendency to control, lack of attention to children at the time they need it and in the way they need, refusal to enter through their door and see through their window. Of course, I can't speak for everyone, but in my perhaps biased view, many parents are groping, evading, avoiding, taking short cuts, taking the easy way out. It doesn't matter what parents are one heroic day when they risk their life for their child, it matters much more how parents measure up in the real thing - the daily grind, the consistent time spent with children, the true disciplining, the hard daily choices. Do others here have comments....are most parents diamonds, just lumps or coal, or somewhere in between?